She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
