he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
