we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
