that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
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