We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
