im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
