I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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