do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize