I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
