just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
