So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
she smelled like a LAN party
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
