I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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