Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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