he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
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