this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
My vagina is officially offended.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Randomize
