Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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