there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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