Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Randomize
