There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize