Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
That's when you crack a 10am beer
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize
