how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
i need some magic done to my vagina
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
