Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
