Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
