return my video game
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
