Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
