Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize