Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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