It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
