So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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