theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
