four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
COCAINE IS GR8
Do you have feelings for this penis?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I'm both gender and math confused
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
