I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Randomize
