did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
