yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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