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There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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