Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
