im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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