For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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