my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
