I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize