Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize