so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
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Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
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I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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