we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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