you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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