he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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