Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize