Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
