We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
