i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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