oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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